As a gamer, I have to acknowledge that apps have pretty much taken over social networking. Forget the days of Xanga, MySpace or early-Facebook when you didn’t have 24 different apps asking you to sample their stuff and to whore yourself out. I must admit that there was a time when I was happily neck-deep in Farmville shit… but that time has passed. My rose-tinted glasses have been lifted and I SEE THE LIGHT!

Others, however, have not.

Farmville

What is FarmVille?

Farmville is a game created by Zynga that takes an RPG to the farm. No, no. I’m not kidding. This 73 million user game is all about growing shit and selling it. It is a glorified version of a lemonade stand. Your Farmville farmer plows, plants and harvests. As you advance through Farmville levels, you can buy different stuff like better animals, better crops and decoration for your farm.

What is good about FarmVille?

The only positive I can see in FarmVille that it gave me something to do while I was in lecture and I was on the verge of falling asleep. It is an appointment-based Facebook game… meaning when time passes in real life, it does in the game, too. This keeps you involved in the game constantly and always checking. So if you are planting blueberries then GOD HELP YOU because unless you check back in an hour or so, they will be gone. It’s a sad fact of life, folks.

Why does FarmVille suck?

TIME PASSES LIKE IN REAL LIFE. Do you know how mind numbingly frustrating it is for me to build my schedule around a G D game? If my druid was to act the same way in World of Warcraft, it would be getting lit the fuck up all night and day. There is a reason why this shouldn’t work.

How do I feel about FarmVille?

Basically, it goes like this. It’s one of the better social games out there because, let’s be honest here, 99.4% of your friends play it. The best part about social games is the comradeship you get plowing the fields together like a bunch of fucking migrant workers. How does it feel being a slave to Facebook?

Oh and did I mention there are FarmVille cheats?