After getting my paws on Warhammer Online: Age of Reckoning I have a few first thoughts. 

• The user interface and basic idea is the same as World of Warcraft, although that’s pretty typical for MMORPGs. 
• You have lots of quests. You level up. I should have expected this.
• All of the characters are some variety of human (humans, high elves, dwarfs, etc). This could be a good or bad thing, but I personally preferred the Taurens in WoW. I like some variety. That’s why I wear colored socks. 
• I’m not sure if it was my 3 year old desktop or the packed servers, but the gameplay was really jumpy for me. I couldn’t go 5 minutes with my character jumping around like a kid with too much chocolate.
• On the bright side, there are a lot of little things that I think will make Warhammer a pretty powerful competitor; the “Tome of Knowledge” is a neat addition. It lays out all of your quests, achievements, et cetera in a neat graphic form. It will entertain people like me who like pretty pictures.
• The RvR (aka. PvP in WoW) lets lower level characters play without being massacred. If you are a 2 when you enter a scenario being level 8 (1-10 level toons would be in that scenario). This means that it takes more skill to RvR. 
• You get XP and can level up in RvR. Neat concept, right? :) 

If you were looking to become any nerdier, by golly, you found the right place. Star Wars: The Force Unleashed for the Nintendo Wii may not be a spectacular experience, but you sure can look awesome while you do it. For only $34.99, you can buy two plastic lightsaber peripherals.

So buy a pack of AAA batteries, turn on your Sony HandyCam, and play some Star Wars!!

Left 4 Dead, the awesometastic zombie survival horror game coming out in November, has some official box art bling up on its site. The zombie hand (dead) with only four (4) digits was pretty clever… but now it has been re-Photoshopped to a left (Left) four digited (4) zombie (dead) hand. 

Hilarious, no?

Here are two Japanese puppets saying something in Japanese to each other. I suppose it’s riveting, genius, mind blowing and epiphany inducing. … Or far from that. Either way it’s an advert for Harvest Moon: Waku Waku Animal March.

The Harvest Moon should be taking advantage of WiiConnect24 in some mysterious way… but the most important thing about the game, I think, is the inclusion of all sorts of super cute animals you can have as pets. 

Pet panda? Why not, I say!

“Maintenant” means “now” in French. So this is good news for all. Konami Digital Entertainment, Inc. announced to the known world that Silent Hill Homecoming has been shipped to retailers nationwide. 

The new installment of Silent Hill will take you to the same creepy, ash-ridden town that has scared the bejeezus out of me ever since I was a wee tyke in a training bra. You can look forward to super-scary, high-quality graphics that make pyramid head even a better representation for guilt.. or sexual tension.. or whatever it is. 

Buy Silent Hill: Homecoming for Xbox360 or PS3 for 60 bones, or you can go to SteamGames.com and download it if you’re a PC gamer.

I’m pretty sure you’ll still have to pay though. Sorries.

Resident Evil 5, that gory and beautiful shooter we will all learn to love, has a few updates floating around the interweb.

First of all, we will be seeing more of Albert Wesker  (AKA the ass that screwed you over multiple times and was the ‘leader’ of S.T.A.R.S). Also Excella Gionne, related to the founder of the TriCell Pharmaceutical Company. As with any other rich heir to a pharmaceutical company, she is a heinous bitch.

Not only will you be meeting some new characters, the baddies you’re going to encounter will be a little different as well. A bat/spider hybrid (Spats?) will be crawling around Africa for you to kill.

You’ll be able to kill these new baddies (along with old ones) with buddies online now. The co-op mode that they are introducing for Resident Evil 5 will let you enjoy the story mode online with a friend. Teamwork while killing super zombies seems to be all the rage.

Even more than waterbras.

Curious cats want to know, Bungie. What are you counting down to? What is this big announcement that is going to be on the horizon?

On their site there is a “Keep It Clean” section with all of this garbage:

<\\> UNSC OFFICE OF NAVAL INTELLIGENCE

<\\> CLASSIFIED SIGNALS ARCHIVE [ONI.SEC.PRTCL-1A]                

<\ OPENED PER OFFICIAL REQUEST [DARE.V.500341(S1)]  

\ SOURCE: URBAN INFRASTRUCTURE A.I. [SUPERINTENDENT]

\ RECIPIENT: PROWLER “TOKYO RULES” [COMM.DUTY.OFFICER]                                                                

>> NOTATION KEYWORD SEARCH: “EMERGENCY” “DATA” “CORRUPTION”                               

>> (…) ~ QUERY RUNNING                               

>> (..)                                

>> (.)   \ VTT TRANSCRIPT AS FOLLOWS…                  

            [SUPERINTENDENT]: “METROPOLITAN EMERGENCY!”                

            [SUPERINTENDENT]: “METROPOLITAN EMERGENCY!”                

            [SUPERINTENDENT]: “METROPOLITAN EMER–!”                

            [COMM.DUTY.OFFICER]: “We know. Personnel are en route. Can you–”                

            [SUPERINTENDENT]: “DETOUR! PROCEED WITH CAUTION!”                

            [COMM.DUTY.OFFICER]: “–put Kinsler on the line?”                

            [SUPERINTENDENT]: [UNITELLIGIBLE > DOG GROWLING(?)]                

            [COMM.DUTY.OFFICER]: “Sorry, what?”                 

            [SUPERINTENDENT]: “BE A HERO! REPORT VIOLATORS!”

            [COMM.DUTY.OFFICER]: “Oh, come on… ”                

            [SUPERINTENDENT]: “METROPOLITAN EMER–!”                

            [COMM.DUTY.OFFICER]: “Listen. We have a report of core data corruption.”                

            [COMM.DUTY.OFFICER]: “I need you to upload your–”                

            [SUPERINTENDENT]: “PARDON OUR DUST!”                

            [SUPERINTENDENT]: “YOUR TAX DOLLARS AT WORK!”                 

            [COMM.DUTY.OFFICER] “–logs for the last twenty-four hours!”                

            [SUPERINTENDENT]: “KEEP IT CLEAN!”                

            [SUPERINTENDENT]: “KEEP IT CLEAN!”                

            [SUPERINTENDENT]: “KEEP IT CLEAN!”                

            [COMM.DUTY.OFFICER]: [UNINTELLIGIBLE > PROFANITY (?)]                

            [COMM.DUTY.OFFICER]: “We’re sending a team, alright?”                

            [COMM.DUTY.OFFICER]: “Until they arrive, all additional comm needs to route through me.”                

            [COMM.DUTY.OFFICER]: “Repeat and acknowledge.”                

            [SUPERINTENDENT]: “OBEY POSTED LIMITS!”                

            [SUPERINTENDENT]: “YIELD TO UPHILL TRAFFIC!”                

            [COMM.DUTY.OFFICER]: “I’ll take that as a ‘yes’…”                

            [SUPERINTENDENT]: “PLEASE REMAIN CALM!”  

\ ~ QUERY COMPLETE

\ ARCHIVE CLOSED \>

I can only assume that they are going to debut a Halo-ish title here soon. And what joy. Joy and happiness for all.

Now where is my Left 4 Dead game?!